IU's Coach should have been Steve John Rick Randy Alford Calipari Pitino Few Whitman
I have the solution to all the problems and heartache caused by the IU coaching search. Greenspan (I know the man is middle aged, but shouldn't an athletic director at least have the appearance that he has been inside a Gym occasionally or knows what a treadmill looks like. Greenie, just say No to the Pizza Express breadsticks with double cheese sauce.)
Sorry, I digress occasionally. Greenspan should have tapped in to the bottomless pockets of Mark Cuban, Johnny Cougar (Uh, sorry Mellancamp), and Cook Medical supplies and hired the "Dream Team" of coaches. Who needs a single head coach, when you can get a whole bench full of Associate Head Coaches. If the price were right, IU could have hired the following and assigned duties to each (remember, the NCAA can no longer limit the salary amounts for Asst. Coaches).
- Rick Pitino: the legend would be in charge of all Press Conferences and contact with print and electronic media. This guy can sell ice to an eskimo. He can spin with the best of them. He will also deal with the transplant fans who have moved in from the East Coast or Kentucky.
- Steve Alford: the IU legend will be in charge of all alumni events. He will personally consult and meet with every VFW, KC, Elks, and related organizations around the state. He will sit and talk IU and Bob Knight with all alumni and fans who became Texas Tech fans. He will be available for photos before and after each game (unlike his senior season, there is No NCAA violation for a coach to pose for calender photos).
- Randy Whitman: the NBA Asst. Coach will be in charge of all contact with Cuban. He also will deal with the ex-players who are upset that an IU guy wasn't given the job. Of course, Randy ran his campaign as part of a ticket that included Keith Smart, so we will hire Smart to be Director of Operations (does anybody know what the guys with this title ever actually do?).
- John Calipari: he will hit the recruiting trail running. He has no coaching responsibilities. All he has to do is get commitments from 5 McDonalds All-Americans a year. He will also be in charge of NCAA compliance (no questions asked, please). In his spare time, he will be the go-between for players' families and other coaches. Also, he will oversee any insurance claims forms that need to be filed by players.
- Mark Few: He is in charge of recruiting players below the Top 100 ranks. He is to develop these players during their careers. During the offseason, he can live at the Graceland-like Estate that we keep hearing he loves in Spokane, Washington.
Sure we need about $15-20 million a year in salary, but this would have made everyone happy. No single coach was going to make everyone happy. One thing is sure. If Sampson wins games, the Hoosier nation will be reunited. Remember after the 2002 run, people came back.
Kelvin Sampson was not my first choice (for the record, it was Rick Barnes/Jay Wright), but I will give him my support. He is the IU coach and deserves a shot to win games and the rest of the fan base over.
Sorry, I digress occasionally. Greenspan should have tapped in to the bottomless pockets of Mark Cuban, Johnny Cougar (Uh, sorry Mellancamp), and Cook Medical supplies and hired the "Dream Team" of coaches. Who needs a single head coach, when you can get a whole bench full of Associate Head Coaches. If the price were right, IU could have hired the following and assigned duties to each (remember, the NCAA can no longer limit the salary amounts for Asst. Coaches).
- Rick Pitino: the legend would be in charge of all Press Conferences and contact with print and electronic media. This guy can sell ice to an eskimo. He can spin with the best of them. He will also deal with the transplant fans who have moved in from the East Coast or Kentucky.
- Steve Alford: the IU legend will be in charge of all alumni events. He will personally consult and meet with every VFW, KC, Elks, and related organizations around the state. He will sit and talk IU and Bob Knight with all alumni and fans who became Texas Tech fans. He will be available for photos before and after each game (unlike his senior season, there is No NCAA violation for a coach to pose for calender photos).
- Randy Whitman: the NBA Asst. Coach will be in charge of all contact with Cuban. He also will deal with the ex-players who are upset that an IU guy wasn't given the job. Of course, Randy ran his campaign as part of a ticket that included Keith Smart, so we will hire Smart to be Director of Operations (does anybody know what the guys with this title ever actually do?).
- John Calipari: he will hit the recruiting trail running. He has no coaching responsibilities. All he has to do is get commitments from 5 McDonalds All-Americans a year. He will also be in charge of NCAA compliance (no questions asked, please). In his spare time, he will be the go-between for players' families and other coaches. Also, he will oversee any insurance claims forms that need to be filed by players.
- Mark Few: He is in charge of recruiting players below the Top 100 ranks. He is to develop these players during their careers. During the offseason, he can live at the Graceland-like Estate that we keep hearing he loves in Spokane, Washington.
Sure we need about $15-20 million a year in salary, but this would have made everyone happy. No single coach was going to make everyone happy. One thing is sure. If Sampson wins games, the Hoosier nation will be reunited. Remember after the 2002 run, people came back.
Kelvin Sampson was not my first choice (for the record, it was Rick Barnes/Jay Wright), but I will give him my support. He is the IU coach and deserves a shot to win games and the rest of the fan base over.
posted by Conrad | 10:09 AM
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